brattycashprincess

A new boy came along named sean4shia. He’s been buying up my videos like crazy. He sent me $100 on Wednesday. He’s also been the secret shopper, buying things on my wishlist.

In his emails, he kept talking about loyalty. If you don’t know already from my previous blogs or dialogue, I value loyalty. It’s one of the things many findommes want, besides money of course. But I can only speak for myself. I always tell my boys, consistency, loyalty and honesty is what I look for in a boy. You need to be consistent with payments and such, and honest with me – as well as yourself.

Boys are always talking about wanting to please. Later, one may find out it was all a lie. The only ones they were thinking about pleasing, were themselves. Then they move on to the next. It’s a selfish act (for a boy), not of course for a domme. But take a long look at yourself, look deep within. Be honest.

Now, so far the only boy that’s ever TRULY has been consistent, loyal, and honest with me has been 27 (who sent me another $150 BOA transfer this morning). He is very sincere. Boys come and go, no doubt. It’s fun while it last, but being honest, I have more fun with boys like 27. Remember that good for nothing candycoatedpig? He was much like 27, but he gets a bug up his ass and plays disappearing games. That’s such a turn off for me. That German schlampe (candycoatedpig), has been peeking around lately. Do I care? Not really. He’s been CONSISTENT with showing me after 6 years that he will serve me, then go in hiding for about a year, just to do it all over again. This is not my ideal boy, no matter how much he’s given me. It’s like any other relationship, how would you feel if let’s say your girlfriend or boyfriend were with you, then would disappear into the night, and come back after a year apologizing with gifts and money, only to do it again? How would you feel about that? Well, let’s just say if my girlfriend ever did that to me, she wouldn’t be my girlfriend, and I would probably be in a new relationship by the time she came back.

The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.
— Maya Angelou

My point is, I develop relationships. My style of domming may be different from the next, I’m sure of it! No domme is the same. I want you fucktards to read the email sean4shia sent me this morning. If after reading the email, taking a deep look within yourself, and realizing you feel the same way, then don’t even bother to message, email, call or try to make any contact with me. This is not what I’m looking for, and you should move on.

Dearest Princess:

Your last email has made me think deeply and confront myself honestly about what i’m doing here, asking for Your gracious attention. i’m sad and ashamed to report that even as i’ve tried to be honest, i haven’t really been honest. i only realized this when You asked if i actually planned to serve You for a long time. At first i thought, “Yeah, sure, 6 months, even a year!” Then i realized how absolutely lame that sounded… soon i figured out that i’m just a selfish little lurker seeking Your kind attention without any intention of really doing anything to earn it or deserve it. i’m just an ignorant, game-playing fool looking to serve only myself. Even when i tried to express my plans for serving You as positively as i could, all i could come up with, honestly, Princess, is the following: “i’ll serve You, Princess, which means that i’ll give you $1000-$2000 over the next year or so, if you’ll send me a grateful email or an atta-boy every once in a while; i’ll also try to do whatever You say during that time, after which i’ll just kinda stop checking into the websites…” which is the worst self-serving load of junk i’ve ever heard. i want to give You money and gifts and buy Your products, enough that it will hurt, but not too much, and in turn i want You to tell me what a good boy i am. Sorry to say, but that’s about it. That’s what i really meant by serving You—and i’m shocked to see myself clearly. i’m no damn good.

That’s what i’ve just realized. It’s the truth: i’m a worthless, selfish little wretch. A fool that shoots his mouth off with nothing to back it up. That also, then, makes me a liar: “service” and “loyalty” obviously don’t mean a thing except in terms of myself. i shuddered when you wrote about “such lies” in your earlier email, and now i know that i’m guilty, even though i really believed i wasn’t lying at the time. i am deeply ashamed of myself, and i beg for Your forgiveness. i’m sorry that i bothered You with my ignorance and stupidity.

You shouldn’t have to spend Your precious time dealing with immature fools who try to get Your attention only to prove to be such game-players and liars. i’m ashamed of what i’ve done.

i’m truly sorry if all i’ve done is to waste Your precious time. What to do now? Do we continue? Do You want anything to do with me? Please let me know. If i’m just too petty and bothersome to deal with in any way, i understand.

i await Your decision,

ashamed and contrite—

sean